Follies Checked

Today hubby and I was due for a dr's appointment at 0800. However, due to a late night, watching Federar came back from behind to win his semi finals match, we missed our alarm clock and was almost late for our appointment. Today was the day I was supposed to get my follies checked. Checked I did.

The dr said there was about 13 eggs. However only 5 are of measurable size - 18, 15, 13, 12 and 8. The other 8 are too small for them to measure for now. I was hoping I will have more eggs that I can use and freeze for future use. Dr did mention that usually people will either decide to abort the cycle or still continue. After much discussion, hubby and me decided that we are just gonna continue and try and leave the rest to fate. I have been asked to continue with 200 units of Puregon for 2 more days. I will come in again on Monday to check on the follicles size and decide when the egg pick up will be.

I am a little sad with the outcome of the egg size. I was hoping for better results. Dr said that I could be a poor responder to the medication. If I am a poor responder why didnt they increase my dosage. Well I guess they know what they are doing.

Well that is my update for now. By the way today, I was given a different kind of Puregon. The injection doesnt use the normal pen. It uses the normal syringe. N the medicine kinds of stings a little more than usual... Like a wound area getting chillied. Well I just hope my eggs will keep growing and growing. Will update again when I feel like up to it.

My Surgery - Laparoscopy/Cystectomy

I just got back from hospital today. Feeling much better than I was 2 days ago. Still feeling a little drowsy from all the drugs. Now resting at home with the help of my sister and mother. She has been cooking porridge and soup for me. Yesterday was chicken soup with fishball and today was beefball with potatoes. I wouldn't be eating this kind of food if I am not sick. Walking is still a pain. The 3 "punctured" wounds are are healing but it is still a bit swollen. Sitting, walking trying to get up is a pain.

Anyway, my surgery went rather well. I wake up at 5.15am on Wednesday. Bathe, got ready and sent dad to work first before we headed to KKH. Reached hospital at 6.50am, checked in with the nurse and was asked to change into my operation gown. Hubby not around yet as he was working night shift. But having mama, sis, bro and his fiance there was a relief. I was scared but I just prayed for the best. I was brought in at 8am. Waited in the OT room for Dr Sadhana to arrive. She arrived 15 minutes later. Talked to me, explained to me about my surgery. The MO and anasthesist came in, talk to me for a while, injected some medication into my IV and I felt as if I was dreaming and flying into the air, saw a mask put on me then before I knew it I was woken up. That was almost 3 hours later at around 12 noon. The pictures below showed my womb before and after the surgery.


The first picture shows my ovaries. Can you see that white bloated thing? That's my right ovary with all the endometriosis inside. Normal ovary size will only be one eighth of that. So you can imagine how big my cysts are. My womb is behind that ovary. and my left ovary is hidden behind the womb. My tubes are Thank God not blocked just swollen. The third picture shows my shrunk ovaries and the 4th one are all the blood being sucked out. That was one painful surgery but i hope everything goes well after this.

In my previous entry I did mention that we are going to start naturally once my wound heals but then after the surgery, Dr Sadhana suggest that I let my wound heals thoroughly. So she is putting me on a GNHR injection for the next 3 months starting from yesterday to suppressed my hormones and prevent my menses for coming for the next 3 months. This is to prevent the endometriosis to come back and affect my surgery area. So yes. No 2ww for the next 3 months. Just me and hubby enjoying ourself, on our honeymoon once more. Then comes April once my menses arrive, I will call KKIVF and start on my IVF cycle. Let's hope everything goes well after this.

For all those who are having very painful period as well one that is heavy for 2 days then light for the rest of the days pls get yourself check out before your cysts gets too big. Coz if it is small you can reduce it just by taking medication rather than surgery. So learn from me and get yourself check out okay...

I am gonna get some rest now. See you all another time once I am feeling much better.

So OUR journey continues...

But in a totally different direction. Mama, dad and sis accompanied me to the hospital today.

Thanks to Allah for my wonderful family.They have been my pillar of strength since I was young till now that I am a married woman. They have never failed to be a part of my life whether good or bad.

Not having hubby by my side was difficult but having mama there beside me throughout my 4 hours there was more than enough. I went for another vaginal scan. I guess I have made really good friends with that 'dildo' look a like thingy. Hehehe...

I arrived as early as 8.30am at KKH. Met Nurse Josephine at the registration counter and was registered as a walk in. WIth so many people outside, I am amazed that Dr Sadhana managed to squeeze me into her schedule. Was sent to another Clinic A for a scan. Did my usual business. This is becoming a routine already. After which was given the picture of my scan. Looking from my untrained eyes, I can even tell where the cysts are. looking at the scan I already know something needs to be done. They were huge. But being not medically trained, of course I had to wait till teh report was out.

Went back to se Dr Sadhana. Was told by Nurse Josephine that my report will only be out in 1 hours time. With a rumbling tummy, looked at dad and asked whether we could go out to have breakfast. Off we went... SO where did we go? Here...


Although not many of the stalls are open, we managed to get to a stall by the corner. The food is nice. I had noodle soup, dad had chicken porridge, sis had mee hongkong and mama ate rice with chap chye. To those of you not in the 2ww or doing any procedure at the moment, go ahead and try the top 10 dishes.

Okay back to my appointment. Went back to hospital at 11am. Waited a while. Met with Dr Sadhana. She pointed out the report to me. So here it goes...

I have 1 cyst on my left ovary measuring 58mm, 2 cysts on my right ovary measuring 54mm and 34mm. Darn!!!! They are huge. No wonder I have such painful periods. The cysts are not cancerous. Thank Allah for that. But my previous guess was wrong. I don't have the 3rd type of cysts. Mine is the endometrial cysts.

Dr Sadhana has scheduled a bilateral laparoscopy/cystectomy/hydrotubation (that is alot of surgery at one go for someone who is scared of needles but since she is opening me up might as well do all at one time.)on the 10th of December 2008. According to her as I came early, she won't have to remove my ovaries. Just remove the cysts. That's another blessing once again. However she did mention that with this kind of cysts, usually it will reduce the number of egss produced during the IVF procedure. My question is Will there still be egg? YES and that is all that matters.

So yes there you go. That's our journey for the time being. If you read the right hand side of my blog, you will notice that there is some changes in our journey. Our 1st IVF cycle for #1 will start in April 2009. With God's grace that is. Insya Allah.

What a bummer!!!

I was getting ready to go out with hubby when I received a call from an unfamiliar number. Usually I will never pick up a call from an unknown caller. But today was different. I answered and I was greated by a very soft-spoken lady whom I remembered clearly - Dr Sadhana. After my Friday's sonogram, I was expecting her call actually but I didn't know that it was gonna be this soon. She voiced her concern about the many cysts in my ovaries. She was also concern about their sizes.

Hey to tell you the truth, since Friday I was concern too. I was worried.

She did mention that if I wanna do the IVF I need to do a surgery to first remove the cysts. Well yup... There goes my IVF journey for the time being. It has come to a screeching halt. Was I upset? Surprising no... I was much stronger than I expected myself to be. No tears, nothing. In fact I was calm. When she asked me to come down tomorrow for another scan, I was ready. In fact even if the size of the cysts are not that big, I might still go for the surgery after all. Just to be sure that my body is in its most prime condition for the IVF procedure.

So yes Alyssa_r, I will not be able to be you cycle buddy this time around. I wish all the best for you. May you achieve your dreams in the nearest time possible.

Some of you might wonder. Wasn't I so eager and excited to start on this IVF journey? YES I was. In fact I am still excited about the journey and the possibility of it. But I am more concern in getting rid of this persistent back ache that I am having as well as the horrible monthly AF. Perhaps with the cysts removed, things will improved for me. No more squirming and screaming in pain everytime AF come to visit.

Wasn't I the least upset? 1 week ago I might have sat down on the floor crying over the obstacles after obstacles that I am faced with. But today, no I am not upset. Coz after my appointment with the MSW I have learnt to let go. I have learnt that there are so much you can plan for but some things are just beyond your comprehension and reach. I have 2 ways of looking at this. Sit down and mourn about my life or get back on my feet and do the best I can to face whatever obstacles that is put in our path. I have a new motto in life:

"We all fail at some point in life. It is not the failing that hurts but rather knowing that we didn't try our best. As long as you have done your best, lift up your head... life must go on"

I am Back!!!

Ouch!!!!!!!!!!!! I am in pain. A little crampy, a little bleeding. Going to sleep over at my mum's place tonight. Hubby working night shift today. I will update again when I get back tomorrow morning. That is if I am up for it. Got lots of things to write. I am currently very concern about a few issues. But I shall go and rest first, check with Dr Google tomorrow and I will update. Hope the rest of you have had a good day. Yeah!!! The weekend is here.

Today in history

After waiting for almost 2 years since our IUI procedure, I have finally made the decision on OUR behalf. I can't wait anymore. Remember my first time schedule was supposed to be in June. But because of financial constraints I decide to wait until after hari raya. Then when I found out that a fellow blogger was already pregnant from the procedure (she did twice by the way) I was just thinking isn't it very expensive to do the procedure? Doestn't it cost almost $10000 every cycle? So I decide to read again... And guess what?

E) How much does it cost to complete one cycle?

It costs about $8, 000 - $10, 000 to complete one cycle of IVF.

F) How much can I claim from Medisave?

Both husband and wife can claim up to $6000, $5000 and
$4000 from Medisave for their first, second and third cycles
respectively.

Oh... I See. I guess now I understands. Today being the 8th of October, I was actually expecting AF to come anytime soon. So I told hubby I am gonna call Dr Chen and tell her that I would be doing the IVF. When I made that phone call, I was told by the reception that Dr Chen does not do the procedure. My next step was to find out where that blogger went. But then again, it is a little far for me. So I resorted to of course the one that deem feasible... KKH.

I called their KKH IVF centre. I was greeted by this nice lady - Nora. She was wonderful. Explained what I need to know and of course clear my worries of the financial issues. If I remember correctly, I can even claim subsidy for $3000 thus not having to pay at all for the first cycle. After all that explanation... I called the appointment centre and made an appointment. Once again I guess Allah was on my side. Someone had cancelled and the earliest appointment with the female doctor of my choice is Dr Sandhana on the 17th of October. That's a weekday!!! I am working. I counted hubby is working too. But that's the earliest she have and after which she will not be available till November. Nope I am not waiting anymore. So I made the appointment even before consulting hubby. I believe he will understands and supports me on my decision.

So yes I am due for an appointment with KKH on Friday, 17th October 2008 (8th day of cycle). That will be a historical day I believe. As I was reading, I understand you can take the medicine on the 21st day of your current cycle. I want to find out whether it is possible for me to do that or do I have to wait till my next cycle before starting on my medication. No more testing, no more semen analysis. We know where our problem is, and we have spend so much on the testing with no results. So straight to the procedure PLEASE!!!. I am so excited of the possibilities... Counting down to Friday.

Wait!!! I am working! HOW??? MC or leave? Hmmm... decisions...decisions...

IVF - In Vitro Fertilisation

I was googling the various fertility treatment programme that is available in the market. Well must do our research first. Since we are gonna part with such a large sum of money. I really do not know what I am in for. The last time when I did the IUI, it was really just a blind effort on our side.

I was reading the IVF procedure conducted at TMC. I am considering of going there straight rather than to Dr Chen then to TMC. The procedure look easy enough but... at some stage it sounds painful. Do I have to remind you that I hate needles.

The IVF programme at Thomson is divided into 4 phases.

￭ Phase 0 The stage of ‘Preparation’ and spans 1 month. The first consultation is usually scheduled on one of cycle days 2-4 to assess the clinical situation and to allow final discussions and fine-tuning before embarking on the programme. A course of oral contraceptive pills (OCP) is usually prescribed to ensure hormonal stability as well as to facilitate scheduling of the IVF programme. Phase 0 may be omitted if certain conditions are fulfilled, whereupon couples can go straight into Phase 1.

￭ Phase 1 The stage of ‘Egg Growth’. You return on day 2 or 3 of the cycle following OCPs to ensure that all is ready to commence hormone treatment. Daily injections with hormones such as FSH, Cetrorelix and hCG are used to stimulate the growth of about 10 eggs. Pen injectors have simplified injections so that many patients are able to self-inject. Blood tests are rarely needed as you are assigned an IVF clinician who will perform all your scans and procedures. Phase 1 typically takes 10 to 14 days and ends when enough eggs are fully grown.

￭ Phase 2 The stage of ‘Procedures’. The first procedure is egg extraction or Oocyte Pick-up (OPU). OPU is typically a 10 – 20 minute procedure performed under a mild, short-acting anaesthetic. The presence of your husband is encouraged to provide emotional support. You are usually well enough to leave the Centre after 2 hours. The eggs in the meantime will be combined with your husband’s sperm in the laboratory. ICSI, where individual sperm is injected to each egg, is performed if the sperm count is very low. Otherwise the sperm and egg are allowed to fertilise naturally. The second procedure is Embryo Transfer (ET) where fertilised eggs are cultured for 3 days after which the ‘best’ 2 or 3 embryos are transferred back into your womb in a simple 10 minute procedure.

￭ Phase 3 The phase of ‘Womb Stabilisation’. Various hormones are administered for a 2 week spell to keep the womb stable until the pregnancy test.

Egg Extraction:

Embryo Transfer:

So after reading all those information, AM I READY??? Physically, emotionally and mentally perhaps. But financially there might be a little problem. We'll see how it goes in the next few months. Insya Allah if everything goes well, I might be embarking on our new journey very soon...

It's THE Day

It was THE day today. Not easy. It started off on a not so good note but after an hour late for the appointment, we finally made it. The traffic was on our side. We reached Thomson Medical at 9.45am but no question was asked. I guess the doctor and nurses understood our situation. We send the specimen in. Were told it would be ready in 2 hours. So we made our way to Toa Payoh to have a late breakfast.

We went from one coffeeshop to the other but could not find any Muslim stall. We were amazed, shocked and stunned. As we were about to give up and make our way to Macdonalds, I saw a signboard. There's a halal food court... Not Banquet. It's called Fork and Spoon (if I remember correctly). The concept is similar to Banquet. The food was not bad. Too bad there was no Mee Bandung so I had Mee Soto instead. the chilli was power!!! Reminded me of a fellow blogger's Mee Soto. Anyway after a satisfying our tummy, we made our way back to Thomson Medical. Waited for about 10 minutes then it was ready.

We took a cab back to Dr Chen's clinic and within minutes I was called in. The result was not too promising. According to her, the reults was the same as the previous time. Not much change. But she asked me to keep my fingers crossed. Although there was not as much as other people but all we needed was one. Just ONE to do the trick. One in a million.... That seems easy enough. But only Allah knows what will happen this time around. We can pray, we can hope but ultimately it will be up to HIM. Please answer MY prayers. Please answer OUR prayers.

So what happens. The procedure was similar to the one we had at Mount Alvernia where they put the dye in me to check if my fallopian tube are fine. The only difference is this time instead of putting a dye, they put the specimen in. The cathither...was damn long.... When she first put it in, I feel this very strong crampy feeling in my abdomen. Similar to that I have when my period is coming but this one is stronger. Felt like something was twisting my abdomen inside out. She asked me to relax... Hmmm... Not an easy thing when you have such a long thing sticking out or in this case in your you know where.... I tfelt as if it took ages for it to be done and there's not even much liquid in the first place. Cant imagine if there was more. Would I have cried??? I tried to be strong. For hubby and myself and our dreams. After another 10 minutes... It was done. She asked me to lie down for about 10 minutes before telling me to move. When everything was done, hubby and me made our way home. The moment I reached home, I slept. Slept for about 4 hours.

Do I feel better now? Slightly. But I am still feeling a little crampy thoug. When to the toilet just now and there was a little spotting. I guess it was natural since they put something in my womb. The womb lining might have been slightly grazed. Now, there is nothing much me and hubby can do. Just wait and see and pray for the best.

2 weeks. That's the waiting time given... Keep a look out at the banner at the side. If there is a change, you will see it soon.

Another appointment with Dr Chen in the morning. Had another scan. Things are surely looking brighter. I am looking forward to the days ahead much more than I used to in the past. Today, the scan showed that there are 3 egg folicles left. The other one I guess had stopped growing and competing. Dr Chen was still worried. She feels that having triplets is still very dangerous for me. I am up for all possibilities. If it is meant to be triplets I will take it with open arms. If it is only meant for one to go through after all this... I am still contented. All I am wishing, praying and hoping for is one first. I have been waiting for this moment for the longest time ever. In fact since we first got married almost 2 1/2 years ago.

This procedure is definitely an expensive one. Today's appointment cost us another$590. I do not mind the cost if it will give us what we had dream of. What an expensive baby/babies this gonna be. Monday. there will be another appointment. She told hubby to be ready on Tuesday, the insemination will probably take place on Tuesday morning. She told me to not go for camp at all. She said I will need all the rest I could possibly get. I keep missing the camp with my class. i was looking forward to bond with them on Monday at least during the bonding games. Now I guess it will be just a memory. Now how do I inform the senior management in school? I have to think fast. real fast.

Okay back to the scan today... The 3 eggs are looking pretty good. In fact she had wanted to do the insemination tomorrow because one of the eggs measuring at 1.8mm is big and mature enough. The other 2 measured 1.4mm. She said if we wait any longer, the other 2 might catch up. For me, if they do, I will still go ahead with the insemination. I am not going to let this round to be wasted. It is not a cheap procedure let me remind you. It has cost us over $1000 so far. I'm not sure how much more it will cost for the insemination. I will ask here when I see her on Monday. Need to confirm everything so that we can transfer the money over. After Tuesday, it is just rest and relax and wait. i should know the outcome whether it is successful or not by the 7th of February. What a great present it will be for hubby!!! For now, it is just more prayers.

Thursday Appointment

After a long day at work, I made my way to Healthcare for Women. Met hubby outside the clinic and visited Dr Chen once again. Another ultrasound was done on me. It was such an expensive procedure. $50 per ultrasound. But I was just glad at what I saw. All 4 egg folicles are growing find. 3 of them measured 1.4mm and the the 4th one measured 1.1mm but it is still catching up. Today, I have another appointment again. The procedure is coming to an end. By Tuesday next week, we should have done the insemination and it will just be waiting from then on. How do i feel? Definitely excited at the posibilities but I am keeping myself cool for the moment. Until the day comes when the dreaded visitor stops coming and on the day I see on the screen the 'possibility'... I will not be putting my hopes too high. Afraid of getting hurt once again.

It's late now. I shall be taking my leave. Time to go to bed and have some rest. Meeting hubby for breakfast in the morning then another visit to the gynae. If only I knew what's gonna happen in the future. I will definitely be more prepared...

Another appointment

Today, after I came back from my course at Buna Vista, I made my way in a cab for my doctor's appointment. This is the 1st appointment after I first started on the injection. Today, was just supposed to be a check on the egg folicles. To see how it is growing and how many is growing. Dr Chen said the right side this month is quiet. All the actions are on the left side. In fact there are 4 egg folicles that are growing very well. They ranged between 0.9 - 1.2. I asked Dr Chen what was the average number she will be looking at. According to her, it will be between 1 and 2. She said 4 could be happening but very interesting. Imagine having a quadruplets??? That will be what happen if all 4 folicles goes through and hubby's sperms do what they are supposed to do. Hmmm.... definitely interesting and scary at the same time.

Appointment has been set again for Thursday, 18th January 2007. Again to check on the size of the folicles. She hopes by then there will be a distinctions between all the 4 folicles and hopefully at most 2 will stand out. So now you know why there is a possibility of more than one baby. Each egg equal to one baby so 4 eggs could mean... Hmmm....

I am not putting my hopes to high. I am not asking for much... Just ONE. One egg is all I am asking for. Let's hope for the best. I will keep myself and you updated of the possibilities ok. For now, more folic acids and enough rest. No stress!!!!

IT's Time

Things didn't go the way I wanted. The way we wanted. The dreaded visitor came to visit on Tuesday, 9th of January 2007. So I called the doctor's office and make an appointment. She set me up for the 11th. Spent $400 plus and we are ready for our next embarkation. Hope this will work this time around. It is not gonna be chaep. Today being the 5th day of the month, I was up for my first injection. Did I mention I was scared of needles. I have a phobia for it. Hubby being the medic he is, helps me to administer the shot. It was over within a few minutes. One down and four more to go. Tuesday I will have another appointment with her. That appointment is to check whether my eggs are growing the way it is supposed to be. For now, let's just pray what we have been waiting for, what we have been dreaming of will turn into a reality. I will come back and let you know what happens ok. Till then have a good break people.

A year has passed...

A year has past since I last wrote here. Actually I didnt want to make a come back till there was any news but I feel that it is high time that I started keeping track of the things that is happening to me and to us. It's been a year since we first started the fertility treatment. Hubby has been on medication every month. So have I. I have also had many x-rays to detect if there was any problems with me. So far everything was fine. For me that is. Thank God.

But things was not so easy for hubby. His test showed that he has a low sperm count and most of his motile sperms are not moving fast enough. Were we disappointed? Yes slightly... but never once did we gave up. Never once did we blame each other for the things that happen or didn't happen to us. We continued with the treatment for a year, stopping for a few months when the cash flow was a bit tight and when we were tired of not getting the desired outcome.

However after much discusssion, in December, hubby and me started treatment again. He is on medication to help improve his sperm count and I am on Clomid to help me increase my chances of ovulation. Perhaps more than one egg can be released during the ovulation. Anyway, we are doing it the natural way this month. Dr was worried my ovulation might fall during the holidays. We might start the first round of IUI (Intra Uterine Insemination) in January. This is tentative though. Depends on when is my Sec 4 camp. Because after calculating, my next ovulation might fall during the time when I am having my camp. So how? I'm not sure. I have a promise to keep. If this goes through I might not be there for my students during their most crucial time.

Ya Allah please help me. Please make my choice easier... Till then, to the rest of you readers out there, please pray for me ok.