What was I thinking? Why was I putting my hopes high only to know that it will be crushed... Here was a pic from this morning test...
Was I disappointed? Well a little bit but not so much that I was distraught. Being out sick the last few days has set me thinking. Really thinking. I want to be healthy and as much rested as I possibly can during the procedure. If I am spending so much money on it I want to know that I have put 110% in the cycle. I do not want to be waking up and saying hey I could have done better if only there was no stress. I do not want what if to be in the picture anymore. If things were to fail (touch wood), I wanna know that I have done my best to get rid of any stress factors. I just wanna be at home resting, growing my eggs and growing my embryos and not be in a classroom shouting at the top of my lungs. What if all those screaming and shouting will reduce my chances? I kind of have think things through. Just need to share this information with hubby and see what he has to say. I am hoping he understands and will give me his full support.
Okay people, I am going to wallow myself in self pity for a bit then I should be back. Someone's wedding is coming up this weekend.
My blood test have to be postpone till my period comes, I guess that should be in April now. Please come already... Please don't make me wait in vain any longer. Everything now has to be pushed forward. ER should be in late May, ET in June and so on... I am crossing my fingers and just praying for the best.
Was I disappointed? Well a little bit but not so much that I was distraught. Being out sick the last few days has set me thinking. Really thinking. I want to be healthy and as much rested as I possibly can during the procedure. If I am spending so much money on it I want to know that I have put 110% in the cycle. I do not want to be waking up and saying hey I could have done better if only there was no stress. I do not want what if to be in the picture anymore. If things were to fail (touch wood), I wanna know that I have done my best to get rid of any stress factors. I just wanna be at home resting, growing my eggs and growing my embryos and not be in a classroom shouting at the top of my lungs. What if all those screaming and shouting will reduce my chances? I kind of have think things through. Just need to share this information with hubby and see what he has to say. I am hoping he understands and will give me his full support.
Okay people, I am going to wallow myself in self pity for a bit then I should be back. Someone's wedding is coming up this weekend.
My blood test have to be postpone till my period comes, I guess that should be in April now. Please come already... Please don't make me wait in vain any longer. Everything now has to be pushed forward. ER should be in late May, ET in June and so on... I am crossing my fingers and just praying for the best.
10 comments:
I'm very sorry.
(((Hug)))
Appreciate the message. Thanks for the hug too.. Needed that.
I am so sorry sweetie!Hang in there - do something nice for yourself and know that I am hugging you from afar!
Oh nicole...
You are the greatest. If only you were here... I believe we would be wonderful buddies who would share stories over cups of coffee...
I am hanging in here... Thanks again babe.
How are you doing? Hope you are holding up too...
So very sorry(((hugs)))
Hi Ros, How have you been? You are such a wonderful writer, I was hooked during the last few entries. What can I say? I don't think I can say anything to you to make the pain less. I went thru many cycles of disappointment, but then Allah gave us a miracle. I thought it would never happen and still I'm praying hard for a healthy baby.
Currently at 15 weeks and my thoughts and love are with you my dear..
Hey babe (happygrub),
I have been reading your site but no stories about you and your pregnancy. Great to know that you and your pregnancy are doing well. I am just hoping my first IVF cycle will be a success.
Both you and Juliah has succeeded. I hope it will be my turn soon. I feel so left out.
I just read somewhere that the word sabar which in Malay is translated as patience, when translated from the Arabic word sabr actually mean preserverance. Which is patience with action. And you'll be taking action soon.. My journey led me to a lot of doctor visits and lots of Clomid, IUI, negative tests, blood works etc etc. U have what it wakes for success, preservere my friend..
Anyway, dunno la, not comfortable with sharing my pregnancy news on my blog yet.. Sometimes I feel like I will wake up and something horrible may happen. I pray for the best..
Babe,
Insya Allah everything will go well. YOu are coming to your 15 weeks right? Insya Allah, Allah will be with you all the way till you give birth to a beautiful and healthy baby.
Yup I am taking action soon. A drastic one at that. Hmmm... I will share soon in an entry. Been too busy running around. Once you give birth must let me know ok. If you don't mind then I would like to come visit... Ambik bau... Hehehe...
You are so sweet. Of course you can come, in fact you can come before that too, since I have my own place now..
I'm on MC, nothing serious don't worry. I'm so glad you made a decision to stop work and concentrate on you, your hubby, your happiness. Can't wait for your cycle to start, I will keep on praying for you.
I'm at 17 weeks now.. Heads up ok girl..
Post a Comment